Still Waters

Fashion Fix #2

2012-01-30T11:05:00.001-06:00

Thanks for joining me for week 2 of Fashion Fix!

Here's my outfit of the week:

(Btw, sorry for the awful picture. I obviously can't take pictures of myself without looking ridiculous!)

Cowl neck sweater dress. It's super soft, and even though it's short sleeved, it's cozy! I love the rouched sleeves and the brown and turquoise color combo.

Leggings - check. When I bought the dress I also picked up a pair of brown tights. A few days later I was getting ready for the day and I threw on this dress....then I looked in the mirror. *Ahem* Not quite long enough to wear with just tights. Enter the ever faithful leggings! They are an outfit saver I tell you.

Ankle boots! I love the straps and the buckles, still deciding if I like the ankle height though.

**Vintage Wrap Bracelet from Pearls and Petals. Let me know if you would like one! :) **

There you have it! What do you think? Want to see more fashion posts? I promise to try and get better photos next time....maybe enlist my hubby to take them for me :)

Happy Chocolate Cake Day!

2012-01-27T10:19:00.001-06:00

I don't know who comes up with all of these crazy days. Today is Chocolate Cake Day, one day last week was Peanut Butter Day. I sure hope you remembered to celebrate. Seriously, I want the job of coming up with silly holidays. I wonder how much it pays???

Anyway, I made you some cake. You know, because I had to.
I give you: Steph's Cocoa Fudge Cupcakes - Enjoy!

Fashion Fix

2012-01-22T14:59:00.000-06:00

I love all things fashion and I thought it would be fun to do a fashion post once in awhile. Sound fun?

Outfit #1

Must be a halfway decent outfit because I was harassed and practically proposed to while wearing it. My husband no longer allows me to leave the house without him, ha! Just kidding....sort of.

I am currently obsessed with boots. I try not to wear anything that I can't wear boots with! It's a problem :) My awesome hubby got these for me for Christmas. He has great taste, I love them!

I also love dresses, but never got to wear them much in the freezing winter months. Enter LEGGINGS. My other obsession. They make it possible to wear cute dresses all year long. YAY!

This mini dress is sleeveless, so I added a fun studded cardi. I usually sort of hate cardigans on me, but I think I like this one.

So this is my outfit pick of the week. What do you think? And do you want to see anymore fashion posts?

Favorite Things and Best Ever Whoopie Pies!

2012-01-19T09:59:00.001-06:00

1. These are hands down the best whoopie pies ever. Maybe even the best dessert ever. It's a bold claim, but you haven't tried these yet. They. Are. Amazing. It's my own special recipe - I will be sharing it soon!

2. I am a makeup junkie, and I love anything that sparkles. Enter a product called Twinkle and Shine. LOVE! Makes the eyes sparkle.

3. There is nothing sweeter than seeing my two baby boys snuggled close together, sound asleep. Melts my heart!

4. I love spending time with my girlie, just the two of us. And I LOVE that she still loves to hug and kiss me :)

5. My new hat. My husband made me buy it because he thought I looked SO cute in it, haha! I always feel like I'm wearing a costume when I wear a hat, but I actually really like this one now!

What are some of your favorite things right now?

I'm baAck!

2012-01-04T13:19:00.001-06:00

Well, hello again, my long lost bloggy friends! It's been awhile, huh?
Happy Thanksgiving, Merry Christmas, Happy New Year... Am I caught up now?
I have been having computer problems that have kept me from blogging lately. Oh. That and a couple little tiny boys that are always in my arms, and a very busy three year old in need of constant attention. Life with infant twins and a toddler is busy for sure, but I am in absolute heaven. Seriously. I am truly loving every sleep deprived second!

I have had so many things I have wanted to share with you, but time (and priorities, see above) did not allow that to happen. I am hoping to share them with you soon. I have some fun new ideas for this blog's future too! So stay tuned! And be sure to "like" Still Waters on Facebook. I will probably be updating that more than the blog, just because it's so fast and I can do it on my ipad while holding babies! :)
Blessings to you all!

Salty&Sweet Treats

2011-11-14T10:44:00.001-06:00

Salty and Sweet.

Who would say this isn't a good thing?

I have always been a fan of chocolate covered pretzels. I mean, what's not to love? Salty, crunchy, sweet.

And chocolate and peanut butter? Psh, come on. That's a no brainer.

And who doesn't love a great chocolate chip cookie?

Meet the result of combining these yummy things (and then some!).

Here' what you're looking at, friends. A chewy peanut butter cookie chock full of chocolate chips, pretzels, butterscotch chips, a touch of sea salt, and a little love. :)

Go ahead tell me you don't want one.

Now head over to Still Waters on facebook and tell me what some of your fave treats are!

Family Fun Day

2011-11-12T15:13:00.001-06:00

We recently had some exceptionally warm weather and took full advantage of it by spending the day outdoors. This is my new family of 5. FIVE! Still can't believe it.

We had a picnic lunch, Bella picked out her own pumpkin, we did some shopping, and just enjoyed the time together out in the sun.

Here's me with my sweet little ones. Oh how I wish time would stand still and they could stay like this forever.

Bella did not take her responsibility of picking her own pumpkin lightly. Trust me, she thought long and hard about it.

Xander and Kingston next to pumpkings much larger than they are. Oh how I love these tiny babies!

My sweet Bella. So happy that it's finally her turn to play in the tunnel of hay :)

I love getting to spend great quality time with my family, and I am feeling so very thankful that these four amazing people are mine :)

My heart is full!

Candy Bar Brownies

2011-11-07T11:39:00.001-06:00

What do you do right after halloween when your house is filled with candy??

Make candy bar brownies, of course!

These are super simple and obviously delicious.

I mean, just look at that fudgy brownie loaded with yummy candy.

Are these calling your name yet?

If you haven't gone completely overboard in your eating of halloween candy, you should still have the goodies you need to make these treats today!

Just whip up a batch of your favorite brownies and mix in 3/4 cup of your favorite chopped candy bars. I used 3 Musketeers and Milky Ways. Pour batter in the pan and sprinkle a few more candy bars on top. (The sugar will start to caramelize in the oven making a yummy chewy mess of goodness.)

That's all folks! Told you they were easy.

Enjoy!

Cinnamon Spice Muffins with Apple Pie Filling

2011-10-23T20:30:00.000-05:00

You all know I love to cook and bake, and with fall in full force around here, I wanted to make something festive. I came up with this recipe and it turned out SO yummy! Eat them for breakfast, a snack, or dessert. Either way they are the perfect fall treat! And as a bonus, while they are baking your house will smell amazing!

So grab a cute little baking assistant and get started!

Muffins

1/4 cup butter

1/4 cup vegetable oil

2/3 cup granulated sugar

1/3 cup brown sugar

2 eggs

1 teaspoons baking powder

1/4 teaspoon baking soda

1/2 teaspoon ground nutmeg

1 1/2 teaspoons cinnamon

1/2 teaspoon salt

1 1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract

2 1/2 cups all-purpose flour

1 cup milk

Filling

6 medium apples cored, peeled and chopped (a slightly tart apples works best)

1/3 cup brown sugar

1/3 cup water

2 teaspoons cinnamon

dash cloves

dash nutmeg

1 Tbs cornstarch

Cook over medium heat until everything caramelizes and thickens, and apples are cooked. About 7 - 10 minutes. Cool.

It's fun too, see?? :)

Glaze

1 1/2 cups powdered sugar

1 teaspoon vanilla

splash of water

Add a spoonful of muffin batter into 16 lined muffin tins. Then add a spoonful of the cooled apple filling. Top with another spoonful of muffin batter until the tins are 3/4 full. Bake for 15 minutes at 400 degrees. Let cool most of the way on wire racks before adding glaze.

Time in The NICU

2011-10-06T12:22:00.001-05:00

Our boys spent three weeks in the NICU. I realize that for babies born at 32 weeks, a 3 week stay is excellent. But at the time it felt like forever. It's just not right to have just given birth and have to go home without your babies. As much as we ached for them to be home with us, we felt so incredibly thankful that they were alive and healthy. They needed this time in the hospital to make up for the time I couldn't give them inside.

They had excellent nurses and doctors. We felt so blessed that we could be confident in the care they were receiving in the hospital.

What a happy day this was, when we got to hold both of our babies together! It was so incredible having them in my arms. Even today, I can hardly believe this is really happening. These boys are truly miracles, and we are so blessed to call them ours!

(This was actually on daddy's birthday - what a sweet gift!)

This was a special moment right here. My grandpa holding his great grandson who we named after him. He is one of my favorite men in the world - such a great guy.

See these faces? Each time we went to see the boys in the NICU, they pretty much slept the whole time. When it was time for us to go, they almost always woke up and looked at us with their big sweet eyes, as if begging us to stay. My heart broke every time we walked out the door. It was nearly impossible to leave.

This was another happy day. The day their feeding tubes came out! One step closer to coming home!

Finally, the big day was here. Our tiny babies were exactly three weeks old - I should have been 35 weeks pregnant - but instead we were bringing out little miracles HOME!!!

I was giddy, I'm not gonna lie :)

At last, Isabella could hold her baby brothers! She is in love with them.

Home never felt so good! Our prayers were answered. Our baby's were home. Our family was all together. Happy. And so thankful. This is BLISS.

Now the adventure of raising three kids under 3 begins :)

The Day My Life Changed...Again

2011-09-21T18:09:00.001-05:00

As I lay on the operating table I knew there was nothing left for me to do. It was all in God's hands now... as it had been all along. My heart was pounding, my thoughts were racing, and a constant strain of prayers were being sent up to heaven.

Please protect my babies.

Please let them be ok.

Please please please.

At 3:56 pm on August 21, 2011, my life changed.

Our first son was born. He was 2 months early but he came out crying. I don't think I ever felt such relief. He had to be pretty healthy to let out a cry like that. Thank you Jesus!!!!

At 3:58pm our second son came into this world; crying just like his brother!

What a miracle! Both babies born this premature were breathing on their own and showed no signs of distress!

They were taken to the NICU where we were told they would stay for approximately a month - simply because they were so premature and they would have to master things like sucking, swallowing and breathing all at once, gaining weight, and maintaining their body temps. They had no major complications. Praise the Lord!

Welcome to the world Xander David!!

Welcome to the world Kingston Thomas!!

Brothers. 4lbs 7oz and 4lbs 3oz of perfection!

We are so happy and so thankful for our sweet tiny boys! Thank you to all who prayed for us. Our God is truly AWESOME.

The Unexpected

2011-09-19T19:01:00.000-05:00

It was a rough pregnancy - including the years it took us to conceive, the many invasive procedures, trips to the emergency room, the heartbreaking miscarriages, and the looming feeling of hopelessness that we might not be able to have more children.

But God is faithful and he chose to fulfill our hearts desire for more babies.

We were elated to discover I was pregnant with twins! Through the painful OHSS, constant horrible "morning" sickness, bed rest, and pre-term labor, I rejoiced because these babies were MIRACLES. I relished every second of this pregnancy because I truly understood the value of these little lives and how I would not be able to carry these babies without God's hand of protection over us.

On August 19th I was admitted to the hospital. I was 32 weeks pregnant and in hard labor. I was given high doses of magnesium to try and slow the contractions and buy these boys a little more time inside. I was terrified when the doctor examined me and told me I was dilated, and every test performed showed that I would indeed deliver soon.

I was afraid for my babies lives.

I made it this far, but it didn't seem like enough time.

I felt like a failure.

On Sunday, August 21, the drugs stopped working. My contractions got stronger and and were coming every minute.

I went from enjoying a visit from my daughter in my hospital room one minute, to being rushed into surgery the next.

I just prayed.

Prayed for the lives of my sons. Prayed that they would defy the odds and be healthy. Prayed that I would be able to hold them very soon and look into their eyes and tell them how much I loved them.

As the surgeons began their work, my husband sat close to me holding my hand, telling me I did great and our babies would be ok.

I was fighting tears, wanting to believe him.

To be continued...

Pregnancy Recap

2011-09-18T19:53:00.001-05:00

Since I've been such a lousy blogger this year I have a lot to catch you up on.

Here is a recap of my pregnancy with our twins.

We had a fabulous Gender Reveal Party and discovered we were having 2 boys!

At this point I went into labor (which, thankfully, the doctors were able to stop) and was put on bed rest. Here's what my days looked like.

A few days after this picture was taken my pregnancy journey came to an end.

To be continued...

To Blog or Not To Blog?

2011-09-15T16:41:00.001-05:00

Once again I have neglected my blog. Are y'all still here? Would you like to hear about all the craziness going on in my life?I keep debating whether or not to continue blogging or just journal for myself.Does anyone really care?Please pipe in if you're reading this - would love to hear your thoughts :)

Loaded Blondies/Loaded Post

2011-07-19T16:20:00.002-05:00

Well, the time has come. I had a good run, I guess.

There will be no more baking, or shopping, or trips to the park with my daughter, or going out with my man.

After a trip to the emergency room this weekend due to constant, painful contractions, the doctor has ordered complete bedrest. I am not surprised. This is about the same time I went into labor with our daughter too.

I think it's a little funny when a doctor puts a woman on bedrest when she has a two year old to take care of. Do they know how active and needy toddlers are?? Not to mention we are in the midst of potty training, which involves running to the bathroom every 20 minutes.

Oh, and did I mention our house is on the market and needs to stay spic and span in case we get a showing.

And we are house hunting.

And I have custom jewelry orders that I cannot fulfill because I can't go out an get the supplies I need.

Oh, and did I mention we have nothing ready for the babies?

Bedrest is stressful.

I can't just put my feet up and watch movies and read books all day like people think. I am only two days in and I already feel stressed out. There's way too much to do and I can't do anything.

Now that I got that off my chest, let me also say this: I am extremely grateful to be pregnant with these babies. It has been a long hard road to get to this point, and we have endured much just to get this far. But I would do it again and again because I know it's worth it. Our sweet Isabella is a result of the same struggles, and she has brought immeasurable joy to us. I know it will be worth it. I know it's the best thing for our boys.

So I will suck it up, and just be thankful to be in this situation. Thankful that I made it to the third trimester. Thankful that our sons are still safe inside. Thank you Jesus!!

Now, I can't bake these days, but I have a few goodies saved up to share with you. How about these Loaded Blondies??

I love bar recipes because they are fast and easy to make, and sooo yummy!

You may think you're not a fan of blondies. You may think they're boring.

These are not boring. Make them. Trust me.

Stephanie's Loaded Blondies

3/4 c butter

1 1/2 cups brown sugar

3 eggs

1 1/2 cps flour

1 tsp baking soda

1 tsp vanilla

1/2 tsp salt

3/4 cup chocolate chips

3/4 cup milk chocolate chunks

3/4 cup white chocolate chips

3/4 cup dark chocolate covered cranberries

Bake in a greased 9x13" pan at 350 for 20-25 min. I like mine slightly under baked so they are gooey and delish! You may never go back to brownies again. :)

Cupcakes That Take The Cake

2011-07-08T10:19:00.004-05:00

Everyone has a favorite kind of cake, right? What's yours? Mine has always been Chocolate, but recently I have converted to Red Velvet.

Maybe it's the moist, light, fluffy texture with just a hint of chocolate flavor. Or maybe it's the cream cheese frosting.

The awesome, makeadoublebatchjusttoeatalone frosting.

Yeah, I think that's it. I have made cream cheese frosting before, but this variation I came up with takes the cake. :)

It is super creamy, delightfully rich, very cream cheesy, and not too sweet. It's perfection. Just try it, you'll see.

Ingredients

2 1/4 cups all-purpose flour
1 1/2 cups sugar
1 tsp baking soda
1 tsp salt
1 tsp cocoa powder
1 1/4 cups vegetable oil
1 cup buttermilk, room temperature
3 large eggs
2 Tbs red food coloring
1 tsp vanilla

For the Cream Cheese Frosting:

1 pound cream cheese, softened
1 1/4 cup butter, softened
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
3 cups sifted confectioners' sugar
Directions
Mix together the flour, sugar, baking soda, salt, and cocoa powder in a bowl and set aside. In a mixer gently beat together the oil, buttermilk, eggs, food coloring, and vanilla. Add the sifted dry ingredients to the wet and mix until smooth.

Divide the batter evenly among 2 lined cupcake tins. Bake in oven at 350 for about 22ish minutes. Test the cupcakes with a toothpick, be sure not to over bake. Cool completely.

Cream Cheese Frosting:

Beat the cream cheese, butter and vanilla together until smooth. Add the sugar (use more or less according to your taste - I don't like overly sweet frosting) and mix until light and creamy.

Of course, as delicious as these would be as is, I couldn't stop there! I did say they were Red Velvet with a Twist after all! I made 2 variations, both of which were fantastic!

Make these for your next party. Or make them because it's the weekend! Red Velvet just might become your new favorite too!

And just in case you're wondering how huge I am at 6 1/2 months pregnant with these 2 boys, here I am!!

Happy weekend all!

****Please take a minute to read this post and consider buying some goodies to help this family raise the overwhelming $30,000 needed to adopt their new child.*****

Shop For A Cause

2011-06-20T08:30:00.000-05:00

Meet Brian and Heather Keehn from The Adventures of Team Keehn
This is an excerpt from their blog:

Brian and I are extremely excited to share some news with you. As most of you know, the Lord has blessed us with the responsibility of raising two amazing boys. Cale who is almost 3 and Quinn who just turned 1 in April. We love having a family and all the joy that comes with it. Recently we have felt the desire to add to our family once again. But this time in a different way. The Lord is leading us to do so through adoption.

For as long as I can remember I have desired to adopt a child. Brian and I talked about it from time to time early in our marriage and more recently (the past year) very frequently.
Currently there are millions of children without families to give them the basic needs like a warm home, food, or more importantly unconditional love. We know that we don't have the means to change the world on our own, but we can change the world for at least one child.

We are so unbelievably overwhelmed with joy and excitement, however it is not going to be easy. As many of you know, adoption is not an inexpensive process. It is going to cost about $30,000. The cost can be overwhelming but we know it is what we are called to do.

*******

I do not know the Keehn's personally, but a friend of mine posted about them on Facebook and ever since I read that post I have felt the Lord tugging at my heart to do something to help.
After our struggles to conceive, and the pain of losing so many babies, my husband and I were starting to consider adoption. I did some research and was overwhelmed by the cost of adoption. As the Keehn's mentioned, it's going to cost them around $30,000!! Yikes!

What do you say we all join in to help them bring their little one home??

From now until July 20, a portion of every purchase you make from Pearls and Petals and Bella Regali will go straight to the Keehn's to help bring their new child home!!!
So buy some jewelry for yourself or your friends, and PLEASE spread the word!! This is a very worthy cause, and you even get jewelry out of the deal!

If you are not into jewelry and don't know anyone who is, (is that possible??) you can make a donation on their blog The Adventures of Team Keehn .

I hope you will join with me in helping this family who is following the Lord's leading. Let's be a blessing to them!!

Gender Reveal!!

2011-06-05T21:20:00.001-05:00

I really wanted to reveal the genders of these babies in a special way. We have been praying for them for so long and we do not take for granted the great miracle God has done in giving them to us. That being said, you can see how a phone call or text just wouldn't cut it!

I decided to throw a Gender Reveal party!

It was so much fun! I loved that both sides of the family could come over for the announcement and help us celebrate this special time.

We found out the genders a week before the party, and everyone was very anxiously awaiting the announcement. I was being stalked on facebook every 30 seconds, and certain people, who will remain nameless, even tried to trick us into spilling the beans early.

But I am an excellent secret keeper, so it didn't work ;)

I baked up some goodies and everyone took a bite at the same time to find out the sex of one baby, then they had to look around to see what color treat other people had to find out the sex of the second baby.

Great anticipation....

I got a blue one!

Blue!

Yay for a son!!

My side of the family is so excited to finally have a boy!!

First great-grandson!!

Yay a nephew!

Daddy was explaining that blue means a brother for Bella!

Aaaannnd ANOTHER BLUE!!

WHAT?! 2 brothers!?!

Oh yes, we are going to have so much fun!!!

These are the yummy treats I made for the special occasion:

Boston Cream Cupcakes

Fudge Brownie Cups Filled with Vanilla Cream and Topped with Ganache

Caramel Cream Truffles Dipped in Ganache and Sprinkles

This was such a fun way to share our happy news! We are super excited to be expecting to little boys!!

22 weeks and going strong, thank you Jesus!

The BIG 20 Week Ultrasound

2011-05-25T14:48:00.005-05:00

So Monday was the big 20 week ultrasound. Every time we get to see our babies I am on a super high for quite a while. It is so amazing to see what God is knitting together inside me. It's still hard for me to believe I am actually pregnant with these precious twins. Talk about miracles!!

Baby A

Baby B

Everything seemed to be ok, but I got a call this morning from my doctor saying I need to go back for a repeat ultrasound. I didn't get any details except that they need to take another look at baby A's heart. I am just praying that everything is ok. I don't like getting scary calls like that. I also don't like when the ultrasound tech takes 2 hours to do the ultrasound (not kidding) and has to bring in a few different people to look at my babies.... There is nothing more I can do than pray. I know they are in God's hands and I am trusting Him too keep them safe!

On a happy note, we found out the sexes of the babies!

I know you all will hate me, but we are not spilling the beans yet!! Not even our families know. You'll find out soon enough ;)

Now we have to start thinking of names, shopping for the nursery, all that fun stuff. So exciting!

Lastly, here is a peek at me at 20 weeks. Fat and happy, lol!

I'm playing a guessing game with my facebook friends called "If you didn't already know, how far along would you think I am?". Risky, I know. I think I look more like 32 weeks...but I am having twins! :)

Things are Changing

2011-05-09T18:28:00.002-05:00

First of all I have to say that I have such sweet readers!! I have received several emails and messages from you guys just checking up on me, wondering how I am doing. Aww shucks, you really like me! :)

Those of you who are my Facebook friends get the play by play of what's happening in my life, but for my poor neglected blog friends, I suppose I owe you an update!

Mostly I have been busy growing babies :)

Here is my attempt to pull my head out of the toilet (which is mainly where you can find me these days), and document in pictures this miraculous journey.

Keep in mind I am carrying twins!!

Now for some random factoids you may or may not be interested in reading ;)

* I have been completely smitten with celery over the past few weeks. It's the only thing I ever care to eat.

* Between 16 and 18 weeks I feel like these babies grew at warp speed and my belly must have doubled in size! (see photos 3 and 4)

* My regular jeans no longer cooperate in the buttoning department.

* I am only 6lbs away from gaining back all the weight I lost during the first trimester, and if these kids keep growing at the speed of light I will get there in no time!

* We get to find out real soon the sex of these little ones. I can't wait!!!

* I am going to try not to go months between posts again. If you just have to know what I'm up to you can find me on facebook!

Do You Believe in Miracles??

2011-04-04T11:27:00.002-05:00

I Gave Myself A Makeover

2011-02-27T21:27:00.002-06:00

So I got bored again with my color and decided to try something fun and exciting. Something I've never done before.

PINK!

I love it!!!!

Hubby hasn't seen it yet, and I can only imagine what he's going to say.

I have approval from my 2 year old though. After I washed my hair she said:

"Mama, you have lipstick in your hair??"

"Haha, no Bella. Do you like my pink hair?"

"Oh yes, sooo pretty!!"

What do you think? It's kind of crazy and totally different than my usual look.

I think that's why I like it!

I love being a girl!

Full of Goodness

2011-02-25T17:56:00.001-06:00

It's the weekend, and we got hit with snow again. Wouldn't this be a great time to gather your kids, or invite some friends over and bake these amazing cookies together??

These were quite possibly the best cookies I have ever made. I was sitting in the kitchen trying to figure out what to bake. I wanted cookies, but something a little different. And Voila! Here's what I came up with.

They were chewy, gooey, peanut buttery, and full of chocolate chunks! As with all of my "recipes" I really don't measure, so the following measurements are approximate.

Give it a whirl - you won't be sorry!

*Full of Goodness Cookies*

3/4 c butter

1 c peanut butter

1 c brown sugar

1/2 c sugar

1/2 t salt

1 t baking soda

1 1/3 c flour

1 cup oats

2 eggs

1 t pure vanilla

12 chocolate chunks

In a mixer blend together butter, peanut butter, brown sugar and sugar until fluffy. In a separate bowl mix salt, baking soda, flour and add gradually to batter. Add vanilla and eggs. Stir in chocolate chunks.

(These cookies have oats but they are not full of oats. If you like a lot of oats in your cookies just add more!)

Drop onto an ungreased cookie sheet and bake at 375 for 7-9 minutes. (I love my cookies slightly under baked so they are a bit gooey in the center. I usually only bake mine for 6 - 7 min.)

Let cool on racks and enjoy!

Knock it Off

2011-02-09T09:13:00.002-06:00

I came across this Knock it Off Contest over at seven thirty three and really wanted to participate! I normally don't join in on these contests, but I couldn't pass this up!

You see, a client came to me with a picture of this beautiful Honora bracelet.

Gorgeous, right??

And she wanted ME to duplicate it for her!

I happily accepted the challenge.

(Sidebar: I do NOT condone ripping off other peoples designs and claiming them as your own - that's stealing. This, however, I openly claim is a replica of a Honora bracelet that a client requested I duplicate for her. Besides, this is a knock off contest...)

I did some shopping and gathered my materials:

* Lots of gorgeous freshwater pearls

*Swarovski crystals in a plethora of colors and sizes

*A pretty silver toggle

*Lots of sliver pins to create links

I went to work, and voila!

Here it is!

I was really pleased with how it turned out, and my client was thrilled! She said it looked identical to the Honora version!! Yay! Mission accomplished!

What do you think? Can't tell the difference right? ;)

They're Finally Here!

2011-01-24T18:14:00.002-06:00

Thanks so much for all the great feedback! What would I do without your help?? :)

The overwhelming response was #3

with #2 coming in a close second

I have decided to use them both!

I would be honored if you would like to display one on your blog!

Take your pick :)

If you enjoy reading my blog, (even if you are a silent lurker who never comments) please take a button - you'll make my day! ;)

Thanks, sweet friends!

PS: Be sure to check out Pearls and Petals - I am giving away $5 to anyone who wants it! See here for the scoop! Just a little treat from me to you :)

I Need Your Help....Again!

2011-01-21T17:02:00.000-06:00

You didn't know I was this indecisive, huh?

I can't make a decision to save my life. So I am calling upon my blog friends for some help!

I decided it's high time my blog had a button, so I finally sat down and made one. I mean two...errr five. Now I can't decide which one is best for my blog.

So here they are:

Cast your votes now!

Let me know which one is your favorite.

I sure hope you're all more decisive than me! :)

Things I've Been Enjoying

2011-01-17T09:23:00.002-06:00

*You all know by now that I am not a fan of the cold. However, snow sure is fun to play in when you have a 2 year old!

I would play in the snow with you any day, my little snow angel!

**I came up with the idea for these cupcakes at Christmastime and I couldn't wait to make them! My taste testers gave them big thumbs up and said they tasted just like Fanny May Mint Meltaways! (One of my favorites!)

These Fudge Mint Truffle Cupcakes are a definite "make again"!

***I am loving bold, chunky jewelry right now, and this Vintage Golden Garden Necklace is at the top of my list of faves!

I ran a special on Facebook this weekend and it was so fun, I want to do another one for all my blog friends! Here's how to play:

The first 10 people to place an order either on etsy @

It's a 10

Bella Regali

or on Facebook via

Pearls and Petals

will win a FREE PIECE OF JEWELRY!!!!

Plus if you shop on facebook at Pearls and Petals you will also receive FREE SHIPPING and and additional 15% off!!

Hurry, the first 10 to checkout are the only ones who will win the FREE JEWELRY.

Consider this an early Valentine from me to you!

****Another thing I am loving (and can never get enough of) is time with my little lady. She is talking up a storm and is so stinkin funny!

We like to tell each other secrets and giggle ;)

*****I am loving this new blog:

It is written by two women who are wives and mothers, documenting a year in their marriages. It's very honest and real (and funny) and relatable. I love when people are open and willing to tell the truth about their lives instead of trying to convince everyone they are perfect. I wish more people were like these ladies! Go check them out!

Pure Deliciousness

2011-01-09T20:00:00.002-06:00

Pure deliciousness is the best way to describe these homemade treats.

I got this idea in my head, and even though I still had tons of treats left from Christmas, I had to make them!

No matter how many you make, you'll wish you made more. Trust me. So make a lot. :)

Here's how:

Steph's Pure Deliciousness Cups

Step 1: Make some gooey caramel from scratch (you know, lots of butter and brown sugar...) or I suppose you can cheat and just melt down some caramels from the store (it just won't be as good, you've been warned).

Step 2: Pour some of your favorite melted chocolate into a cupcake liner. I used silicone cups. You can just paint the chocolate on the bottom and up the sides a bit, but I like lots of chocolate, so I just poured it in! :)

Step 3: Add a warm gooey (generous) spoonful of caramel over the chocolate layer.

Step 4: Add a pretzel.

Step 5: Smother that unsuspecting pretzel with more delicious chocolate.

Step 6: Top with a garnish. I chose m&m's, but you could add just about anything!

Step 7: This is the hardest part of the whole thing.

Wait.

Stick them in the fridge and let them set. I know it's hard, but you can do it! It will be well worth the wait!

Step 8: Peel them out of their restricting shells and devour.

You can thank me later. :)

**If you have not become a fan of my facebook page Pearls and Petals, do it today (you won't be sorry)! I am offer BIG discounts for all fans!!**

My Addiction...Help!!

2011-01-05T08:41:00.001-06:00

I can feel it coming on again.
It always does.
In the beginning, it's fresh, new, exciting - but eventually that wears off and I get the itch.

I'm never satisfied.

I keep coming back for more.

It's an addiction.

I'm talking about hair color.
Obviously.

My name is Stephanie and I am addicted to hair color!

I know I just changed to red, but now I'm used to it, which means I want to change it again!

Good thing I'm a professional.  With an addiction like this, I'd be paying thousands of dollars a year to feed my habit. 

The only question is....

what color should I do next?? Help!
I've already had just about every color, so I'm not afraid to do something drastic! I once went from blonde to black. Jet black. I have no fear. Ha!

What do you think I should do next? Soon you'll be seeing my roots, so I need ideas!
 Thoughts??   :)

Time

2011-01-03T22:11:00.002-06:00

I'm back.

Without meaning to, I took a couple weeks off from my blog and my shops. These are things that I enjoy, but they take time away from my two favorite people, and unfortunately sometimes they take away from time I should be spending in the Word.

Over the last few years I have been made more and more aware of the fact that we don't know how much time we will have with the ones we love. I'd hate to look back, years from now, and say "I sure wish I spent more time with ____ rather than all the time I put into blogging, or stocking up my shops, or anything else that doesn't really matter in the end.

Don't get me wrong, I am still going to blog, and I am still designing new gems, but I am being more careful about when I do these things.

We may not ever be blessed with another child, and our little Bella is already TWO. Time is flying and I want to soak in every second. When she takes her tiny hand and grabs mine saying "Come, Mama! Dance!" I intend to do just that. When she just wants me to hold and snuggle her or draw pictures of fishies for the thousandth time - I will. Everything else can wait.

I have a lot of new exciting things I have been working on that I hope to share with you real soon. So I will see you during nap time, and at bedtime, and when my man is at work, and after I've spent time with the One who has given me this time in the first place...

What's It All About?

2010-12-20T17:13:00.001-06:00

I used to LOVE Christmas.

I loved the decorating, the baking, listening to Christmas music, the shopping, shopping, shopping, the parties, more baking, gift giving, etc.

But now it all feels like "busy work". Things to keep me occupied and overly busy so I am distracted from what's always on my mind.

The last few Christmases have been hard. Some heartbreaking memories kept me from feeling the giddiness I usually felt that time of year.

This year, I hate to say, I am dreading Christmas. Everything just feels so silly and petty, and I wish I could sleep through the whole thing.

This year is harder.

Our baby was due to be born on Christmas day. But my womb is empty and so are my arms.

Five months after we lost that baby, I became pregnant again. With twins. Though the pain of losing our baby was terrible, I was thankful that these babies were here - almost as though to comfort me. We may not hold our little one on Christmas, but we had a flicker of joy; the hope that soon two more babes would join our family.

Six weeks ago we lost those babies too.

Three years ago, after many difficult years of trying to conceive, we were expecting twins. We told our families on Christmas day, and on January 1st, I miscarried.

Three months later, I was pregnant with twins again. Though I miscarried one baby, by the grace of God, our sweet miracle Isabella Hope was born.

It seems like each year Christmas (and life) gets harder and more painful. Each year we mourn the loss of more babies we never had the chance to hold. Each year, and this year in particular, I struggle so hard to not fall apart. To pretend that Christmas is fun and wonderful. For the sake of our daughter, I try to let her experience of Christmas be one that is full of joy.

I try not to let by broken heart bleed for all to see.

Oh, but this year is hard.

Friends, I write this today, not to depress you or bring you down, but to show you that I know pain and suffering, and loss. But I have HOPE.

You see, Christmas is about a baby. Just not my baby.

This baby is the son of God, born to the virgin Mary.

He was fully God yet he came to this world a human - a baby.

This baby grew to be a man, and lived a perfect life as an example to us.

He did not have an easy life. He was a man of sorrows, therefore we can know that Jesus, the son of God himself, understands our pain.

He suffered and died on the cross to pay the penalty for our wrongdoings. He got what we deserved, and He paid willingly because He LOVES us.

He was dead and buried for 3 days before he came back to life to prove His victory over sin and death. And he ascended into heaven where He reigns eternally.

The sweet baby Jesus we sing about at Christmas was so much more than just a baby. He is Emmanuel, God with us. The King of kings and Lord of lords. He came to bring us peace.

And though you may feel like me right now - heartbroken and beaten down. There is a peace that passes all understanding, and it can only come from Him.

Luke 2:11 Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is the Messiah, the Lord.

Isaiah 9:6

⁶ For to us a child is born,
to us a son is given,

and the government will be on his shoulders.
And he will be called
Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God,
Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.

Hugs and Kisses and Chocolate!

2010-12-15T09:47:00.000-06:00

We have a nice big island in our kitchen. When I bake, that is where I work. Of course, Isabella likes to be with me all the time, so she is also my baking buddy. I love it. I stand on one side of the island, and she pulls up a chair and watches and "helps" on the other side.

She knows I don't let her up on the counter when I'm cooking, but she's very very sneaky....

She will say "Mommy? I need a kiss." How can I say no to that? So she has to climb onto the counter to reach me well enough to give me a kiss.

Then.... "Mommy? I need a hug." Again, I can't turn her down. So up she comes for a hug. Just as I tell her "ok, now sit back down in your chair" she says "Other side??" (she likes to give hugs on both sides. Once with her head to the right, and once on the left.)

I am a sucker for those hugs and kisses. And she is very generous with them, especially when it gets her closer to my cookies! :)

But this is what happens when I'm baking up a storm and I turn around for a second to get cookies out of the oven.

She wasted no time.

She was a girl on a mission.... She saw chocolate!

She was pretty proud of herself!

I Need Your Help

2010-12-13T12:57:00.001-06:00

Ok, kids, I need your help.

Here's the story:

I was out shopping last week and something caught my eye

My first reaction was: wow, that's ugly.

Then I saw another one sitting in the wrong spot on the wrong shelf. Hmm, it actually has a nice vintage European look too it, I thought. Maybe it's not so ugly. I left it on the shelf and continued my shopping.

Now all i could think about was that awesome ugly soap dispenser, and I had to have it. So I bought it.

When my husband saw it he asked my why I would buy something like that. I told him my theory about how it has an old world European look and doesn't it look great in our kitchen? Um no. It's just ugly, he said.

So I ask you, is this awesome or ugly?

Be honest, I can take it!

*******

On another note, it's time for the Last Chance Before Christmas Sale!

Be sure to check out my etsy shops

Bella Regali

and

It's A 10

Everything is BUY 2 GET 1 FREE!!

Plus I am including a FREE fabulous gift in every order!

I know I'm running low on items, but there are new pieces, and with the new year will come a whole new stock of goodies. You can mix and match between shops if you like. I will refund to you the cost of the 3rd item as soon as your payment is received. It's your last chance to snatch up some last minute gifts/stocking stuffers! (or grab those pieces you've been eyeing for yourself!)

Happy shopping, and don't forget to vote on the awesome-ugly soap dispenser!

Let Her Eat Cake! (The Happiness of Turning 2: Part 2)

2010-12-06T22:37:00.000-06:00

I didn't know what sort of cake to make for Isabella's 2nd birthday. She doesn't watch tv or movies, and she's not into any specific characters. But she does love candy.

And flowers.

But mostly candy. :)

So I came up with a flower garden cake... with candy!

She was really excited for her cake!

But it seemed like she had to wait forever for us to be ready to eat!

Finally, it was time!!

Where to start?

It was finger lickin' good!

And, apparently, table lickin' good!

Happy birthday, sweet girl! We love you so much!

The Happiness of Turning 2: Part 1

2010-11-22T18:14:00.001-06:00

Last week our favorite little girl turned 2! I cannot believe how fast these years have gone by. I try to soak up every second with her, but it is flying by!

We though it would be really fun to bring her into the city for a day at the aquarium.

We were right.

Isabella was dancing and squealing with delight at every turn! It is so wonderful to see her light up and be filled with joy and awe as she learns and discovers new things.

We saw sharks...

...she loved them!!

She got to pet a Blue Tongued Skink....

....and Sea Stars!

She pretended to be a penguin and went down the "ice slides" with Daddy.

We saw super cool jellyfish!

We had to take a picture of this sign. I thought it was so funny "Misunderstanding DOOM Sharks"

This lizard was just hanging out in the water.

We had a blast together, but all that excitement is tiring.

She has not stopped talking about petting the skink and the sea stars. And every 5 minutes she tells me about the sharks and fishies, and "big guys" (that's what we called the ginormous fish). I love that she had so much fun - we all did. It was a great family day, and just the beginning of a week long celebration of our sweet birthday girl!

Explaining My Absence. Warning: Not a Happy Post

2010-11-15T10:20:00.001-06:00

Well, here I am again. You may have noticed my absence from blogging for awhile now. And if you've been reading my blog for any length of time, or if you know me in real life, you probably know the reason why.
Yep. Another round of heartache has been generously dropped on us.
Funny how we've been through this so many times, yet each time I expect a different outcome.
But it's always the same story.
I get pregnant.
We get excited.
We think we will finally have another child.
I get violently ill and assume that's a good sign. (After all it's the high level of hormones that produces such sickness.)
Then we go in for a normal doctors appointment and hear the devastating news.
Again.
"I'm sorry, it doesn't look good. You will probably miscarry within a week."

Que the sounds of our hearts shattering.

I fall apart instantly and cry uncontrollably for what seems like hours. My husband tries to be strong, but he's falling apart too. Our 2 year old tells me "Mommy cry, Mommy sad. Bella sad too."

More tears.

Once again she is robbed of her siblings. And we are robbed of our children. And there is an ache that seems endless.

Last week we lost two more of our precious little ones.

Before you go and tell me that "God has a plan", and "there's a reason for everything", and 'at least you have Bella", "your babies are in heaven", "God is in control". Let me first tell you that I know all these things. I know God knows what he is doing - but I don't, and for us all we can feel is pain. And I know our babies are in heaven, but you know what? I don't want to be the mother of 6 dead babies. I know they are in heaven, but I want them here with me.
I am MAD.
There, I said it.
I hate the feeling of being teased by God. He allows me to get pregnant (which in itself is a really difficult process) only to take our babies away.
Don't judge me. I know he has a plan, and I know there is a reason. But for the life of me I can't understand why he would allow 6 of our babies to die.
Just imagine how we feel. Many of you are mothers. What if God decided to take away your child? Or 2 or 4 or 6 children??
It's easy to say "trust in God" but sometimes it's really hard to do. Right now it's hard.
It feels like we just keep getting trampled on, and every time we are about to get up we get knocked over again. And again. And again. We are broken and bruised. And tired.
I just want peace.
I want to remember what it feels like to not have a broken heart.
I want to hold my babies in my arms and kiss their sweet faces.
I want to know if I have sons or daughters....

It's just too much.

I'm sorry if you came here looking for an uplifting post. I know it's thanksgiving time and most people are posting recipes or the things they are thankful for. Believe me, I know I have much to be thankful for, I do not take those things for granted. But today I am broken and feeling defeated. So that's what I'm writing about.

I am reading Psalm 77 and relating to David in his distress. And I am clinging to His promises.
Praying for peace. Praying for comfort. Praying for miracles....

Psalm 77

¹ I cried out to God for help;

I cried out to God to hear me.
² When I was in distress, I sought the Lord;
at night I stretched out untiring hands,
and I would not be comforted.
³ I remembered you, God, and I groaned;
I meditated, and my spirit grew faint.^[b]
⁴ You kept my eyes from closing;
I was too troubled to speak.
⁵ I thought about the former days,
the years of long ago;
⁶ I remembered my songs in the night.
My heart meditated and my spirit asked:
⁷ “Will the Lord reject forever?
Will he never show his favor again?
⁸ Has his unfailing love vanished forever?
Has his promise failed for all time?
⁹ Has God forgotten to be merciful?
Has he in anger withheld his compassion?”
¹⁰ Then I thought, “To this I will appeal:
the years when the Most High stretched out his right hand.
¹¹ I will remember the deeds of the LORD;
yes, I will remember your miracles of long ago.
¹² I will consider all your works
and meditate on all your mighty deeds.”
¹³ Your ways, God, are holy.
What god is as great as our God?
¹⁴ You are the God who performs miracles;
you display your power among the peoples.
¹⁵ With your mighty arm you redeemed your people,
the descendants of Jacob and Joseph.
¹⁶ The waters saw you, God,
the waters saw you and writhed;
the very depths were convulsed.
¹⁷ The clouds poured down water,
the heavens resounded with thunder;
your arrows flashed back and forth.
¹⁸ Your thunder was heard in the whirlwind,
your lightning lit up the world;
the earth trembled and quaked.
¹⁹ Your path led through the sea,
your way through the mighty waters,
though your footprints were not seen.
²⁰ You led your people like a flock
by the hand of Moses and Aaron.

Peanut Butter and Chocolate...Need I say More??

2010-10-13T13:20:00.004-05:00

I made these delectable treats several weeks ago, and I am still thinking about them.

Is there a better combination that chocolate and peanut butter? If so, you better tell me about it!

I was told to bring a "simple" sweet treat to a family gathering, and this was one of the things I brought. It's hard for me to be too simple when it comes to baking, but these were pretty easy and I just couldn't resist making them.

I really need to start writing down my "recipes" right away, so I remember how I made them. Hopefully I'm not forgetting anything!

(These are great for all of you gluten free people, too!)

Flourless Intense Peanut Butter Cookies

2 cups peanut butter

2 eggs

1 cup sugar

That's all folks! Mix em all together and refrigerate for an hour.

Form into balls and place on cookie sheet. Flatten with a fork for a traditional pb cookie look.

Bake at 350 for 12 min. Cool completely.

To make them extra tasty, melt 10 ish oz of your favorite chocolate and dip each side of the cookie into it. Dip generously, kids, it's delicious. :)

Now for a little pizazz, I chopped 1/3 ish cups of honey roasted peanuts and immediately after dipping cookies into chocolate, I dipped them into the nuts. I made 1/2 with nuts and 1/2 without.

Make these. Your tummy will thank you!

But wait, there's more! Be sure to click here now! It will make you happy and save your sanity come Christmas time. Treat yourself and take care of all the gals on your "nice list".

C'mon, all the cool kids are doing it ;)

Miscellany Monday

2010-10-11T10:34:00.000-05:00

1. I love this man.

I love when he takes me on romantic dates in the city.

I love when part of the day includes sushi and him buying me "whatever car I want" (sweet)!

I will keep him :)

2. I love this girl. She can always make me smile. We're so happy to have her :)

3. The month long birthday bash for Bella Regali continues!

Today is the LAST DAY to get anything and everything you like from Bella Regali @ Buy 2 Get 1 FREE!

But wait there's more! :)

See that Like Box to your right for my fan page Pearls and Petals?

Go ahead and click like! Become a fan and you will be the first to know about giveaways, sales, and new items, plus you will get more savings than anyone else! Become a fan today and the Buy 2 Get 1 Free special will also apply to my shop It's A 10 where everything is under $10!

What better time than now to start Christmas shopping! There's no better price than free!!

4. Here are some of the new goodies you can find @ It's a 10.

These one of a kind bows are perfect for all ages. Me and my near 2 year old both rock the look :)

And these sweet flower clips are great clipped to a headband (included), clipped to a ponytail or directly in your hair, clipped to a purse or diaper bag to add some pizazz, or clipped to a necklace for a trendy look!

Cute, right? And they look just as great on all ages. We are addicted!

With everything in my shops @ Buy 2 Get 1 FREE, why not mix and match and find a new must have accessory for you and some friends?

Cry Baby....

2010-09-30T11:38:00.000-05:00

.....that's what I've become.

Things will be going along just fine, and then out of nowhere something will remind me, and I feel it coming. My throat feels tight, my eyes start to sting. I do my best to hold it all in, but lately I haven't been so good at that.

I hate crying. Especially in front of people. I get so embarrassed; especially when it seems to come out of the blue and everyone around me is happy and laughing. They must all think I'm crazy!

I even cry at parties.

How sad is that??

My dear friend told me that I should just embrace it. That next time I'm feeling down I should throw a party so I can just ruin it by crying.

Just want I want to be: The one who cries at parties. Nice.

I always feel awful when it happens, and I get so embarrassed.

But the other day I had a epiphany.

99% of the time my tears are for my babies. Feeling shame about crying for them is insane!

They were my children. Saying I shouldn't cry for them is like saying they aren't worth my tears. But they are. My heart aches for them, and I think it would be much more shameful for me to feel any other way.

So I will probably keep crying.

I will probably cry at Isabella's party - because her twin brother or sister won't be there.

I will cry at Christmas because that is the day our baby was due to be born, but he or she won't be there.

There are so many days that hold meaning for me, and on those days I will most likely cry.

And that's ok.

I am not sorry for my tears because they are for my children.

I am sorry for making people feel bad, and uncomfortable. I'm sorry if my tears come at an inappropriate time. And I'm sorry if my heartache puts a damper on your day.

I have so very much to be thankful for, and much to be heartbroken over... and sometimes I just can't help but show it.

Favorite Cake

2010-09-21T14:24:00.006-05:00

I am joining in on Shutter Love Tuesdays - Fave Cakes at the Trendy Treehouse.

We are supposed to share photos of our favorite cakes and I can't think of a better cake to share than our baby girl's 1st birthday cake!

Do I get bonus points for making it extra delicious? ;)

Ha! She couldn't get enough!

She had to make absolutely sure every last bit was eaten.

I have never had more fun making a cake than I did with this one!

Now the question is.... what do I make for her birthday this year? It's coming up!

Miscellany Monday

2010-09-20T07:22:00.002-05:00

1. For the past few days my almost 2 year old daughter has been asking for kisses each time she gets a boo-boo. She really has been taking full advantage too. She may ever so slightly graze her finger along the couch, and she will run to me with her fingers in the air asking for a kiss.

I don't mind at all.

Today she told me her tooth hurt. I thought a kiss on the cheek might make her feel better.

"Bella, do you want a kiss?" I asked.

"Yes" she eagerly replied, and proceeded to open her mouth extra wide so I could kiss her tooth! So funny! :)

2. I need a kiss on my fingers.... they are sore from working hard on some intricate new jewelry designs for Bella Regali. Be on the look out!

3. You may be wondering what happened to all the fun headbands and flower goodies I was designing for Pearls and Petals. I am happy to tell you that I have restocked my other shop It's A 10 with lots of funky new designs for you to enjoy! Click here to check them out! Let me know what you think!

Sugar, Sugar

2010-09-13T08:37:00.000-05:00

So me and my husband like each other. Kind of a lot - it's no secret. ;)

One of our "pet names" for each other is sugar. We rarely use the other person's actual name, it's always "I love you, Sugar" or "I'm so glad I get to be married to you, Sugar" or "Sugar, what's for dinner?"....

You get the idea.

Anyway, the other day I was in the kitchen making dinner and Bella was riffling through the pantry, as usual. She found a bag of powdered sugar and a bag of brown sugar and was carrying them around the room.

"What do you have, Bella?" I asked.

She looked at me, unsure of what to say.

"That's sugar!" I told her.

"Daddy!!!" she replied.

A little confused, I repeated, "Bella, that's sugar in those bags."

Bright eyed and excited, she shrieked, "Sugar, Daddy!"

Then I realized what was happening. She hears me call him sugar all the time, of course she thinks I'm talking about him now!

I just smiled and laughed, so happy that she sees how happy her mommy and daddy are together. And we are so happy she is ours.

I just love these sweet (and funny) moments, I don't ever want to forget these precious things!

Lovin' From the Oven

2010-09-07T09:09:00.006-05:00

This weekend we had a taste of fall weather, which by the way, I am not too thrilled about. I love summer. I love the sun and the hot weather. I am not too happy about all the people trying to hurry fall along - I am clinging to summer! Fall here looks like this: gray skies 99% of the time, rain, cold, dreary weather that makes you want to stay in bed all day. Why would anyone choose that over warm sunny days?? But I digress...

My point was this: the cooler days made me want to whip up something warm and comforting with some autumn spice. So I decided to make my family some homemade cinnamon rolls. I don't think I had ever made them before and I didn't have a cherished family recipe handed down form my great grandmother, so I did what I usually do and just added to a bowl what I thought seemed right. Makes more sense than finding a recipe, right?

They turned out really yummy, so I thought I'd share the *recipe* with you!

I am telling you, not much smells better than buttery cinnamon goodness wafting through the air!

Grab a mixing bowl and toss in:

2 (ish) cups of flour

1 tsp baking powder

1tsp baking soda

3/4 cup buttermilk

1/4 cup oil

Mix them all together until a nice dough forms.

Toss some flour on your clean counter and roll out the dough into a rectangle.

Butter the dough generously with very soft butter. I think I used 1/2 cup :)

Sprinkle on a mixture of:

1/3 (ish) cup brown sugar

1/3 (ish) cup white sugar

1 Tbs (ish) cinnamon

(I like a lot of cinnamon, you may want to use less.)

Roll it up and slice into 12 (ish) rolls. Place them in a buttered pan with enough space in between for the rolls to expand.

Bake at 375 for about 25 min.

Frosting

3 Tbs soft butter

3 Tbs soft cream cheese

1 1/2 (ish) cups powdered sugar

a few splashes of milk

Mix together and pour over hot rolls.

Give these a try, I think you'll love them!

PS: If you're starting to Christmas shop, or just love getting PRACTICALLY FREE jewelry and gifts check this out!

More Than Words.... Promises!

2010-09-01T14:07:00.001-05:00

I have mentioned before that I am participating in a challenge to read through the Bible, cover to cover, in 90 days. It's going really well. This is not the first time I have read through the Bible, however, after all I have been through I am seeing passages in a new way, and I suppose I am seeking comfort. So many verses have really spoken to me and this passage from Isaiah 43 is so wonderful I just have to share it with you.
This is not the entire chapter; I have just written down the parts that I found to be so comforting. (To read the entire chapter open your Bible to Isaiah 43, or if you don't have a Bible just google it!)

But now, this is what the LORD says— he who created you, he who formed you:
"Fear not, for I have redeemed you;
I have summoned you by name; you are mine. ² When you pass through the waters,
I will be with you;
and when you pass through the rivers,
they will not sweep over you.
When you walk through the fire,
you will not be burned;
the flames will not set you ablaze.
³ For I am the LORD, your God, your Savior.
⁴ You are precious and honored in my sight,
and I love you.
⁵ Do not be afraid, for I am with you.

¹⁰ "You are my witnesses," declares the LORD,
"and my servant whom I have chosen,
so that you may know and believe me
and understand that I am he.
Before me no god was formed,
nor will there be one after me.
¹¹ I, am the LORD,
and apart from me there is no savior.
¹² I have revealed and saved and proclaimed—
I, and not some foreign god among you.
You are my witnesses," declares the LORD, "that I am God.
¹³ Yes, and from ancient days I am he.
No one can deliver out of my hand.
When I act, who can reverse it?"

¹⁹ See, I am doing a new thing!

Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?
I am making a way in the desert
and streams in the wasteland.
²⁰ The wild animals honor me,
because I provide water in the desert
and streams in the wasteland,
to give drink to my people, my chosen,
²¹ the people I formed for myself
that they may proclaim my praise.

²⁵ "I, even I, am he who blots out
your transgressions, for my own sake,
and remembers your sins no more.

I love that God promises to be with us in the hard times; He promises to not let them overtake us. I love that He makes all things new, He uses our circumstances for His glory and our good. I love how He provides even when it seems impossible - nothing is impossible for Him! And I love that if we surrender to Him, he promises to forgive us completely for all the rotten things we do. I love that His grace and forgiveness goes far beyond the depths of our sin. He says we are precious and honored in His sight, and He loves us!
I think that's pretty fantastic!

I hope these verses will be a blessing to you as they have been to me.
Please feel free to email me infinitemystery@hotmail.com if you have questions or want someone to talk to.

Friday Feature

2010-08-20T09:36:00.000-05:00

Is anyone else happy it's Friday??

I am hoping to have a girls night tonight and if I'm really lucky, maybe I'll snag a date with my man this weekend!

Also, I want to go shopping. For myself. I've realized that since my daughter was born I haven't really bought anything for me; it all goes to that sweet little girl. A couple times I've gone out shopping with the intention of getting something for myself, but it's so easy to get sidetracked by all the cute little girl stuff. A few weeks ago I came home with about 15 outfits and 4 pairs of shoes for the little lady, and I got toothpaste. Hmmm. Maybe next time I'll get 15 outfits and 4 pairs of shoes! :)

I know a lot of you women are the same way. You're always buying something for your kids, or a friend (which is all good and noble), but never treat yourself.

Today is the day, friends!

And I'm gonna make it fun and painless by offering you a sweet deal!

This is Fridays Feature!

From now until my next Feature is posted I am offering my anklets at a super bargain price.

Regularly $15, but as my featured items they are now only $8.95 or 2 for $15. That's like getting 2 for the price of one!

Here are your choices:

Summer Breeze

Pink Shimmer

Sweet Sparkle

Purple Shimmer

Painted Glass

Simple email me at infinitemystery@hotmail.com or leave a comment with your email and let me know which one(s) you want! There are also coordinating headbands and earrings for most of these that can be found here all for under $10!

Miscellany Monday

2010-08-16T10:13:00.001-05:00

It's Monday, you know what that means!

1. Last night in a heroic effort to save my daughter from falling backwards, I bent my nail backwards. Like it came off of my finger and had to be put back on. *shiver* It seemed to reattach itself, so that's good, but WOW that hurt!!

2. Yesterday Bella and I decided to visit Daddy at work and bring him some treats to help his day go by a little faster. While hanging out in the car we caught a glimpse of what's to come.

Scary.

3. Head over to the fabulous Carissa's blog (just click the button at the top of the post) and enter her giveaway - it's a good one *ahem*.

4. Everyone who makes a purchase from

Bella Regali

It's a 10

Pearls and Petals

and mentions her giveaway will get 10% off everything you order and you'll also get a gift card!!

It's a swell deal ;)

5. I think some play time at the park is in order for today - it's gorgeous out there!

Utopia

2010-08-13T18:36:00.000-05:00

Remember how I told you that I am the designated baker in my family?

Well, having family visit from out of town means lots of baking for me, and I wanted to try something new and fun. But what??

Our three family favorites are: cheesecake, chocolate chip cookies, and my famous brownies. So I came up with a fun little treat that incorporates all three!!

Isn't it cute?

I call them Utopia Bites. That about explains them.

I tried a few varieties. Chocolate chip cookie/brownie, brownie/cheesecake, cheesecake/cookie, and a combination of all three. You know what I decided? You really can't go wrong here. So made a whole bunch of each kind.

They tasted great, but they looked like they needed some "dressing up".
So I whipped up a batch of my peanut butter frosting and added just a dollop to each one.

Yum! Now they tasted even better, but still they seemed to be missing something.
Color.
M&M's to the rescue!

They were a big hit!

Cupcakes? Yes, Please!

2010-08-09T16:40:00.001-05:00

This weekend my Aunt and Uncle and two of my cousins came to visit us. They are possibly the sweetest people ever, and I was so happy to see them again!

Being the designated family baker, I made more than a few sweet treats for our gatherings together, and this is one I thought I'd share with you!

Who doesn't like a good cupcake??

And who better to try out my new concoction than family, right? (They make the best guinea pigs.)

I introduce to you, my very own,

Over the Top Cupcakes

(They got their name from my sweet aunt who was still talking about them days later!)

***

They started out combining my hubby's favorite devil's food cake "recipe" with a yummy fudge cake "recipe".

(If you are wondering why I'm using quotations around words like "recipe", you must be new here. Welcome! My name is Stephanie and I have an inability to use recipes. I much prefer to invent my own - it's more fun that way!)

Then, because I wanted to do something different, I whipped up some scrumptious vanilla creme, and filled the center of each cupcake

Now, because they weren't decadent enough, I topped them with a combo of my chocolate fudge frosting and rich chocolate ganache! This right here is the reason to eat these cupcakes - yum!!!

Finish them off with some sprinkles and enjoy!

My Little Nurse

2010-08-06T08:28:00.000-05:00

This has been my little helper the last few days while daddy's been at work.

She's been taking extra good care of me ;)

She even taught me the proper way to eat Cheerios:

with a fork.

My New Look!!

2010-07-22T17:10:00.012-05:00

Ready for the big reveal??

I know it's all you've been able to think about ;)

* Disclaimer: All of the makeover pics are self portraits, so they are not the best. And yes, I do realize that I look naked in them. It was a strapless dress, I swear!*

Here I was with my blonde highlights:

Then I decided it is just too "typical" to have blonde hair in the summer. I don't like to be like everyone else ;)

So I pulled out my beaker and six different bottles of color to create my perfect shade of....

RED

I love it!!

It feels good to do a drastic change sometimes.... even if it's just hair color!

What do you think???

** Don't miss out on all the RED HOT sales right now in my etsy shops! Click here or check the sidebar for details!**

Ready For Change

2010-07-21T14:24:00.004-05:00

I want to change so many things in my life right now.

I know that His ways are higher than my ways, and His plans are greater than I can imagine.

So I am trying to be still.... and trust.

But one thing I can change is my hair!

And because I am a hairstylist, I always have color on hand and can change it up whenever the mood strikes me!

Which is often.

Yesterday I took the plunge and said goodbye to my blonde hair.

Ever the mad scientist, I mixed up about 6 different colors to get the perfect shade of.......

Well, you'll just have to wait and see ;)

Miscellany Monday

2010-07-18T17:23:00.015-05:00

Here are some miscellany tidbits for Monday.

1. The hubby watched Man v. Food and decided he needed to eat a HUGE ice cream sundae asap. So being a supportive wife, I made some homemade hot fudge sauce to make it extra delicious.

2. You can also turn a chocolate chip cookie into a decadent treat by dipping it in this gooey goodness! Or so I hear....

3. We've been getting in lots of hugs and giggles around here. But how could we not with this sweet girl around?

4. Daddy and Isabella have been sharing secrets with teddy....

5. Sometimes we play in the sink, just because.

6. And I have a new obsession. Headbands full of bling!

These are sooo me. I love jewelry so much, I will wear it anywhere I can fit it!
It's unique, sparkly, super affordable, AND....

perfect on everyone! Even one year olds can rock this look! ( please excuse the mess, Daddy did her hair :) ) Head over to It's A 10 to get yours today!

Check here for INCREDIBLE deals going on now!!!

You Asked, I'm Answering!

2010-07-12T23:14:00.000-05:00

This is Part 2 to my Q&A posts. You asked so many questions, I had to break it up into separate posts (for the sake of saving you from complete boredom).

Ready?

Hilary Lane said...

If you could have any job in the world (outside of the home) regardless of the money (and of course you'd still get to spend as much time with the sweet babe as you do now) what would you do?

This one is tough. I actually really love what I do now, but if I were to do something else..... I always wanted to be a doctor, and for a long time I've considered going back to school to become a medical diagnostic sonography tech. I am fascinated by medicine and the miracle of the human body. And on the complete other end of the spectrum, I kind of wish I took advantage of some opportunities and gone into modeling. I have had several offers and opportunities, but I am so shy and I always get too nervous to go through with it! I do think it would be fun though ;)

Chantel and Michael Magistro said...

whats your favorite book?

The Catcher in The Rye. This is very "un-Steph-like" as my man would say, but I love this book. I've read it so many times. Usually I prefer to read non fiction, especially memoirs, but this book is an exception.
What's your least favorite chore?

Cleaning toilets. YUCK!
What's your favorite chore?

You all know I love to vacuum! :)
What music do you like?

I like a ton of different kinds of music, but a few of my current favorites are Ingrid Michaelson, Over the Rhine, old Caedmon's Call, Owl City, and Stevie Wonder just to name a few.
What shows do you like?

I am loving the documentary Boston Med (shocker), Grey's Anatomy, How I Met Your Mother, Say Yes to the Dress, The IT Crowd. Not a whole lot of good stuff on tv.
How did you decide on Isabella's name?

I always loved the name Isabella. When I was a kid I didn't know of anyone with that name, but of course the year we finally have a baby, it's one of the most popular names! Oh well, we love it. And we chose Hope as her middle name because through all of our struggles in trying to have her, we always kept hope in the Lord that He would one day bless us with a baby. We are so thankful for her!!
What was your wedding/reception like?

We got married outside in a gazebo in a beautiful garden by a pond on a warm day in May. It was perfect. I cried, and Jared wiped my tears. He's the sweetest :) One day I will have to post some pictures!

LeAnna said...

Beka snagged my first question! Curious how you and the Hubs met. So, my next question would be:

Did you always want to be a cosmetologist, or did you have other "when I grow up" aspirations?

And...

What is something God is teaching you right now, even in the midst of pain and heartache?

Ok, well I already answered the first 2 questions. What is something God is teaching me right now?? He is teaching me a lot. I don't want to get too personal, but one thing I am learning is the power of prayer. (And I am so thankful for those who faithfully pray for me!) Also, I am learning to trust more. I do not trust people for the plain and simple reason that they cannot be trusted! (Well, it's true.) But I am learning to let people in, and I am learning to trust in God's plan even though I cannot understand the means sometimes....

♥ Noelle ♥ said...

How do you always manage to look SO BEAUTIFUL????

Bahahahaha! Thanks, Noelle :)

Well, there are still several questions left. Do you guys want me to answer any more or have you had about enough of me??

Something Sweet

2010-07-09T10:46:00.008-05:00

Wow. Is it really Friday already???

We have been crazy busy around here lately, and most of the time I don't even know what day it is!

While my photos are importing from my camera, I am taking a 10 minute breather to check in with you, before the weekend madness sets in.

Ahhhhhh...... or maybe I'll take a nap instead??

No.

I keep wanting to share things with all of you, but I never seem to have the time anymore to write it all down. I guess my thoughts and whereabouts will remain a mystery. ;)

But these are a few things that should not be kept secret.

Because they involve chocolate.

I don't have time to post "recipes"today, so for now pictures will have to suffice.

(If you have a photo you want to share link up here with Missy!)

White Chocolate Strawberry Cheesecake with Chocolate drizzle (a Stephanie original recipe)
Fudge Rum Cups....need I say more????
Chocolate Peanut Butter Cheesecake probably my favorite cheesecake ever! (a Stephanie original recipe)
Have a sweet weekend, all!

PS: Check here for INCREDIBLE deals!!!

Fab Foto Friday and Some Answers

2010-07-02T16:38:00.004-05:00

This is my pick for Fab Foto Friday.

Every time I see this picture, I smile. It just makes me happy! We flew out to South Carolina so Isabella could meet her great grandparents. They pretty much adore each other. It's the sweetest thing seeing them with her - they light up every time!

If you have a fab foto you want to share, head on over to Missy's and link up!

****

Now for some answers....

You all had so many questions! Several questions require a lengthy answer, but I will do my best to be brief - I don't want to bore you to tears.

beka said...

How/when did you meet your husband? We met at church, and knew each other for a few years before we started dating. We met, became friends, became super close friends, then became a couple and didn't realize it, then we made it official! Haha. When I was 20 years old and we had been dating for a year and a half, he asked me to be his wife. Less than 5 months later we were married and honeymooning in Maui!

Did you always want to have children someday? YES! I was obsessed with babies as a kid, and I always wanted to have a big family of my own one day.

What's one of your favorite books of the Bible? I have many favorites but if I had to just pick one I think I would choose Ruth. It's an amazing story! If you haven't read it, go read it now!

Mrs. Lukie said...

Love this :)
You have such beautiful skin--what is your skin care regimen? I am a little embarrassed to answer this one. I used to buy all the fancy/expensive products: cleansers, toners, masks, creams.... then one day I ran out of my supply and just didn't buy any more. It must have been when I was pregnant with Bella and was on bedrest. Just between us, I just use regular soap and some moisturizer! Sshhh, don't tell anyone. ;)

These 2 are similar so I will put them together.

Kimberly said...

I have to think of a question. Just got on to say I made your peanut butter cups! they were great!! now...hmmmm...a question! What hair products do you use on your hair? Your hair always looks nice & what is your favorite perfume??

BK said...

Cool! Ummmmm is your hair naturally curly? How do you style it?

Ok. Yes, my hair is naturally curly. I like it because it's not too curly that I can't do anything else with it. I pretty much style it differently everyday. I get bored easily, ha! And as far as products go, being a stylist I feel it is my duty to buy every single product ever made. So I have tons! Basically I use a smoothing shampoo and conditioner (Matrix Sleek Look is my fave), some type of leave in conditioner (my hair, being curly and color treated needs lots of moisture!). The rest depends on how I wear my hair for the day. But those are my everyday basics!

How did you start making jewelry? I played around with making jewelry even as a kid. I am in love with all things sparkly, and I have to wear jewelry every single day. I like to be unique and have pieces that no one else has. I hate walking into a room and seeing 10 other people with the same earrings! So last year I bought all necessary supplies to make my own one - of a - kind, high quality jewelry, and I became instantly hooked! My husband would ask, "how much more are you going to make??" So I decided to try my hand at selling some of my creations, and thus Bella Regali was born! I love it!

Alright, I am out of time so this is all you get today! I will try to answer more of your questions in my next post. Happy weekend!

What Do You Want to Know?

2010-06-29T15:39:00.005-05:00

I saw this idea on LeAnna's blog and thought it looked like fun.

It's Question and Answer day over at Hope Road.

To change it up around here I decided to link up and play along!

This is a post where you can ASK ME ANYTHING! (said in a cheesy game show host voice)

Ask me any question you want and in my next post I will give you the answer.

For example: After baking chocolate chip cookies do I ever let my 1 year old lick the spatula?
Heavens no! ;)

Is there anything you want to know about me? A burning question you always wanted to ask?

You can ask me anything at all, but I reserve the right to remain silent if your question is inappropriate.

It can be personal, silly, or strange. So let's have some fun! Put on your thinking caps
and be creative - or not, it's up to you. :)

Ask away!

Ramblings and FREEBIES!!

2010-06-24T15:03:00.013-05:00

Guess what?

When I got up this morning I found out I was featured on 2 blogs today for my chocolate peanut butter cups!! So fun! Who says you need a recipe to bake??

***

Today I was making a pair of earrings for someone and when I was finished, I hung them on the gong we have on our kitchen table to see how they looked. I had to take a picture because I noticed that it looked like something. Do you see it?

Totally looks like an owl, right? Ha!

***

This is the what I made for my dad on Father's day.

Boston Creme Pie is his favorite. Usually it is frosted only on top, but my theory is if some chocolate is good, more is better! So I frosted the whole thing :)

The frosting I make is the yummiest (if I can be so bold). Every time I make a cake my man always requests this frosting. It's so rich but it's not heavy. It practically drips down the cake.

Yum.

I'll never understand using frosting from a can. Or making frosting with anything other than butter. You want it to taste good, right?

***

I made these for my honey.

He occasionally buys me those edible arrangement and then steals all the chocolate covered apples and bananas!

So I made a platter of my version of his faves just for him, filled with dark chocolate apples, chocolate/cinnamon apples, and white chocolate/dark chocolate swirl bananas.

He was pretty happy :)

***

Now for a little treat for you!

I am offering a huge deal at Pearls and Petals!

All necklaces are BOGO 1/2 off and everything else is BOGO FREE!!!!!!

Yeah, I said FREE

Get yours while you still can! There's only one of each!

(Just make your purchases and I will refund the cost of your 1/2 off or free items. Or if you prefer, email me and let me know what you want and I will reserve them for you and mark them down for you before you pay. )

My Miscellany Monday

2010-06-21T14:33:00.003-05:00

It's that time again for

1. Like I've said before I am a girly girl, but there is one area where I am unlike almost every girl I've ever met.

(Hmmmm, I wonder what you think I'm about to say!)

I kind of hate talking on the phone. I know, *gasp*!! Can I still be a woman and not like talking on the phone??

I would much rather talk to you in person - phones make me uncomfortable. There. I said it.

2. One thing I love about summer is that I get to wear skirts and sundresses all the time! I haven't bought a pair of shorts in years. I just don't like them.

3. People don't realize how hard days like Father's day can be for some people. I was praying yesterday for those who have lost their fathers, or lost a child, or long to be a father but it just hasn't happened. I prayed for my husband. It's not fair for him. On mother's day I was pregnant, and on father's day the recent loss of our baby is heavy on our hearts. It just breaks my heart that he has so many babies that will never know what an incredible daddy he is, yet I rejoice that our sweet Bella knows it full well.

4. Sometimes life just SUCKS. Can I say that?

5. I am officially the designated baker of the family. I think I will be thrown out next time we all get together if I don't bring some goodies. More on that in my next post!

6. I have added something new to my etsy shop Pearls and Petals.

Sweet baby headbands - go figure.

7. I recently have been given some blog awards, and I feel like a tool, but I can't even remember who they are from. I'm so sorry. I guess that means you should take them away! :/

This one came from Jen. She is such a godly person, and has been so faithful in praying for me during this trial in our lives. Thanks so much, Jen! You have been such an encouragement to me. We are doing a challenge together to read through the Bible in 90 days - it's gonna be great! I am so thankful for the wonderful friends I have met through blogging. I never expected that when I started 6 months ago.

Fab Foto Friday!

2010-06-18T17:12:00.003-05:00

I am joining Missy in Fab Foto Friday!

Check out her blog, she is SUPER talented when it comes to photography. I'm almost embarrassed for her to see mine.

I am not claiming that this is a fab foto per say, but it is a favorite. And since it is Father's Day weekend I wanted to use a picture of my dad.

Here he is holding my sweet baby when she was just a few months old.

*sigh*

Such sweet memories!

Better Late Than Never!

2010-06-17T13:37:00.005-05:00

I was looking back over some old blog posts and I realized that months ago I promised you something and didn't deliver.

I was writing about things that I was thankful for and this was one of them. I was asked to share the recipe.... but I forgot all about it!

Today I will remedy that oversight and tempt your taste buds with my yummy peanut butter cups!

(I think this picture is actually of the caramel version - but you get the idea!)

Those of you who know me, know that I am not a recipe person. I know what I like, and I know enough about cooking/baking that I can come up with something tasty on my own. I'm not big on measuring - I just add until it seems right. So far I haven't had any disasters.

But that makes it hard to share the "recipe" when people ask for it.

I don't think you could mess up this one though. It's super simple and tastes great every time - so give it a try!

Stephanie's PB Cups

1 stick of butter

2 ish cups of sugar

1 1/2 ish cups graham cracker crumbs

1 ish cup peanut butter

12 oz your favorite chocolate bar/chips

Melt the butter in a large bowl. And add the sugar, graham cracker crumbs, and peanut butter. Mix well.

In separate bowl melt chocolate and stir until smooth.

(For this part I like to use baking cups, but you can just make it in one 13x9" pan)

Pour melted chocolate into baking cups until the bottom is covered completely. Add peanut butter mixture and top with remaining chocolate. Chill for at least 2 hours. Store leftovers in the refrigerator.

There you have it! A super easy, really yummy treat for all you chocolate pb lovers out there!

Appreciation

2010-06-13T20:22:00.004-05:00

Lately I have felt the need to keep busy.

All the time.

When Bella goes down for a nap it gets too quiet and I have too much time to think.

So I've been making jewelry.

Lots.

Of.

Jewelry.

It keeps my hands busy and occupies my mind, and there's no sign of me slowing down.

Which brings me to my point.

How does a "Friends and Followers Appreciation Sale" sound???

(I do have the best friends and followers, you know.)

These offers are on some of my favorite pieces from Bella Regali but they are only good until Thursday 7/17.

Remember these pieces are one of a kind, so if you like them get them as fast as you can - before someone else does (use elbows if you have to).

Without further ado, here are the featured items:

Fairytale Necklace

and

Fairytale Earrings

Buy the necklace at a discounted price and get the earrings at 60% off! This set is SO pretty. It sparkles like crazy and is super feminine - my kind of jewelry ;)

Royalty Necklace

Buy the necklace at a discounted price and get a pair of earrings FREE. You can even pick which earrings you want from here.

This necklace is the epitome of Bella Regali jewelry. If you haven't made a purchase yet, this would be a great place to start! It's very unique, a little bit vintage, and is so elegant. I love this one!

Garden Party Necklace

Buy the necklace at a discounted price and get a pair of earrings FREE. Again, you get to choose your earrings from here!!

I am also giving 10% off everything at Pearls and Petals!!

This is a big deal - lots of items are already under $10!!

Thanks for being so kind to me these past few weeks. Please enjoy this tiny token of my appreciation - you are the best!

*As a side note, most earrings can be made into clip ons as well!*

**For each of these offers, once payment is received I will refund you the cost of your free or discounted items asap!**

Overwhelmed

2010-06-07T16:39:00.001-05:00

These past couple of weeks have been overwhelming.

My body is healing but my heart is in a million pieces.

Though this was our fourth baby to go on to heaven, it was physically a much more traumatic experience, and in turn I feel emotionally broken and scarred.

My arms ache for the babies I never had the chance to hold.

I keep thinking about how this August our twins should be turning two.

In November, on Isabella's birthday, we should be celebrating the birth of her and her brother or sister.

And on Christmas day this year I know my heart will be breaking again because there will not be a tiny new baby in our family picture.

People all around me are having babies - and that's hard for me. I want to rejoice with them because I know what a precious blessing it is to have a baby. I am genuinely happy that they are able to experience such joy.

But at the same time it's a constant reminder of all I have lost.

And on come the tears.

I know people who have not gone through this think I am just jealous of them, or that I am being too sensitive. But that is not the case.

I just miss my babies.

I don't want them to feel like I am not happy for them, or that I don't care - I do. It's just hard for me to show it right now.

I am grieving.

I don't know what God's plan is for us, and I don't understand why He would allow this to happen again and again. But I know He will comfort me like no one else can. I know He understands my pain and sorrow because He experienced it when His son died.

And it was all a part of His perfect plan.

I want to send out a heartfelt thank you to all of you who have left me comments, sent emails, letters, cards, meals, and most importantly prayers.

I am so touched by how many of you have reached out to me in one way or another these past few weeks. Many of you I've never even met, others I barely know, and some of you have let me know you care much more than I ever realized. Going through hard times can help you see who the people are who truly care about you. So thank you so very much. I know I have not responded to many of you personally yet, but please know that I have felt so loved by you!

I do not want to be depressing, so I will probably not be posting for a little while longer. I just wanted to let you know how I've been doing since I received such an outpouring of love from you.

I will be checking up on your blogs as time allows between snuggles with my hubby and sweet girl.

Please continue to pray as you think of us!

Heartbroken

2010-05-26T17:17:00.004-05:00

I am writing today with a broken heart.

I can't believe this is happening again.

For the last 9 1/2 weeks I have been keeping a secret.

It wasn't easy.

I was unbelievably sick all day, everyday.

But I was deliriously happy.

I was pregnant.

We were expecting a little brother or sister for our precious Isabella on Christmas day.

What a perfect gift, we thought.

We had a few scares, and a few trips to the emergency room, but our baby seemed to be a tough cookie. Each time we were able to see baby's sweet heartbeat, and we were SO thankful.

I have never been pregnant and not miscarried, but it seemed like this time would be an exception.

It wasn't.

Yesterday I was rushed to the hospital with severe bleeding and intense labor pains.

I knew it was the end. But deep in my heart I still had hope.

After all, God can do anything. Maybe he would see fit to save our sweet tiny baby. Why would it be his will to take a fourth baby from us?

To hear the doctor say the words fetal demise was nearly unbearable.

I was taken into surgery at midnight.

I went in with a baby and came out all alone.

I feel so empty.

Devastated.

Heartbroken.

It's been my dream to have a big family, but it seems like God may have other plans.

It's nearly impossible for me to get pregnant, and each time I do, our babies don't survive.

I don't think I can do this again. The pain is too great.

I know my four babies are together in heaven, in the arms of Jesus.

I can't compete with that.

I will be taking a break from blogging for a while. I don't know how long, but I cannot keep up with it now. What would I write about? Nothing else seems to matter.

I need time to heal.

Please pray for us.

Miscellany Monday

2010-05-16T15:20:00.004-05:00

I have decided to jump in and join Carissa in Miscellany Monday.

1. As many of you know, our house is on the market, and we have been having tons of showings which is great, but I am running out of things to do during the hour we have to be out of the house. Usually we go to the park but last time it was pouring rain, so me and Bella went to a store to kill some time. Too bad killing time cost me $100 in unnecessary items.
2.I think I have a disease. I swear every time I eat a super unhealthy meal, followed by a dessert that probably contains 2000 calories, I lose weight. Ever since I had my daughter my body seems to be working backwards. I lost 4lbs this weekend. Don't hate me - remember I probably have a disease. I bet if I ate nothing but salad I'd gain 10lbs.
3. I am obsessed with vacuuming. I hated it when I lived with my parents and now I just have to vacuum. Like everyday. I LOVE having a clean house. It makes me feel so much better.
4. My husband discovered a British sit com a few months ago, and now he's got me hooked too! It's called The IT Crowd. Hilarious. Watch it.
5. I heard the song Kokomo by the Beach Boys a while ago and I felt like I was in kindergarten again. It was my all time favorite song. That's saying a lot for a 5 year old.

Still Waters

Fashion Fix #2

Happy Chocolate Cake Day!

Fashion Fix

Favorite Things and Best Ever Whoopie Pies!

I'm baAck!

Salty&Sweet Treats

Family Fun Day

Candy Bar Brownies

Cinnamon Spice Muffins with Apple Pie Filling

Time in The NICU

The Day My Life Changed...Again

The Unexpected

Pregnancy Recap

To Blog or Not To Blog?

Loaded Blondies/Loaded Post

Cupcakes That Take The Cake

Everyone has a favorite kind of cake, right? What's yours? Mine has always been Chocolate, but recently I have converted to Red Velvet.

Maybe it's the moist, light, fluffy texture with just a hint of chocolate flavor. Or maybe it's the cream cheese frosting.

The awesome, makeadoublebatchjusttoeatalone frosting.

Yeah, I think that's it. I have made cream cheese frosting before, but this variation I came up with takes the cake. :)

Ingredients

For the Cream Cheese Frosting:

Shop For A Cause

Gender Reveal!!

The BIG 20 Week Ultrasound

Things are Changing

Do You Believe in Miracles??

I Gave Myself A Makeover

Full of Goodness

Knock it Off

They're Finally Here!

I Need Your Help....Again!

Things I've Been Enjoying

*Pure Deliciousness*

My Addiction...Help!!

Time

What's It All About?

6 For to us a child is born,

to us a son is given,

Hugs and Kisses and Chocolate!

*I Need Your Help*

Let Her Eat Cake! (The Happiness of Turning 2: Part 2)

The Happiness of Turning 2: Part 1

Explaining My Absence. Warning: Not a Happy Post

Psalm 77

1 I cried out to God for help;

Peanut Butter and Chocolate...Need I say More??

Miscellany Monday

Cry Baby....

Favorite Cake

Miscellany Monday

Sugar, Sugar

Lovin' From the Oven

More Than Words.... Promises!

19 See, I am doing a new thing!

Friday Feature

Miscellany Monday

Utopia

Cupcakes? Yes, Please!

My Little Nurse

My New Look!!

Ready For Change

Miscellany Monday

You Asked, I'm Answering!

Something Sweet

Fab Foto Friday and Some Answers

What Do You Want to Know?

Ramblings and FREEBIES!!

My Miscellany Monday

Fab Foto Friday!

Better Late Than Never!

Appreciation

Overwhelmed

Heartbroken

Miscellany Monday

Pure Deliciousness

⁶ For to us a child is born,

I Need Your Help

¹ I cried out to God for help;

¹⁹ See, I am doing a new thing!