Heartbroken

I am writing today with a broken heart.

I can't believe this is happening again.

For the last 9 1/2 weeks I have been keeping a secret.

It wasn't easy.

I was unbelievably sick all day, everyday.

But I was deliriously happy.

I was pregnant.

We were expecting a little brother or sister for our precious Isabella on Christmas day.

What a perfect gift, we thought.

We had a few scares, and a few trips to the emergency room, but our baby seemed to be a tough cookie. Each time we were able to see baby's sweet heartbeat, and we were SO thankful.

I have never been pregnant and not miscarried, but it seemed like this time would be an exception.

It wasn't.

Yesterday I was rushed to the hospital with severe bleeding and intense labor pains.

I knew it was the end. But deep in my heart I still had hope.

After all, God can do anything. Maybe he would see fit to save our sweet tiny baby. Why would it be his will to take a fourth baby from us?

To hear the doctor say the words fetal demise was nearly unbearable.

I was taken into surgery at midnight.

I went in with a baby and came out all alone.

I feel so empty.

Devastated.

Heartbroken.

It's been my dream to have a big family, but it seems like God may have other plans.

It's nearly impossible for me to get pregnant, and each time I do, our babies don't survive.

I don't think I can do this again. The pain is too great.

I know my four babies are together in heaven, in the arms of Jesus.

I can't compete with that.

I will be taking a break from blogging for a while. I don't know how long, but I cannot keep up with it now. What would I write about? Nothing else seems to matter.

I need time to heal.

Please pray for us.

Miscellany Monday

I have decided to jump in and join Carissa in Miscellany Monday.

1. As many of you know, our house is on the market, and we have been having tons of showings which is great, but I am running out of things to do during the hour we have to be out of the house. Usually we go to the park but last time it was pouring rain, so me and Bella went to a store to kill some time. Too bad killing time cost me $100 in unnecessary items.
2.I think I have a disease. I swear every time I eat a super unhealthy meal, followed by a dessert that probably contains 2000 calories, I lose weight. Ever since I had my daughter my body seems to be working backwards. I lost 4lbs this weekend. Don't hate me - remember I probably have a disease. I bet if I ate nothing but salad I'd gain 10lbs.
3. I am obsessed with vacuuming. I hated it when I lived with my parents and now I just have to vacuum. Like everyday. I LOVE having a clean house. It makes me feel so much better.
4. My husband discovered a British sit com a few months ago, and now he's got me hooked too! It's called The IT Crowd. Hilarious. Watch it.
5. I heard the song Kokomo by the Beach Boys a while ago and I felt like I was in kindergarten again. It was my all time favorite song. That's saying a lot for a 5 year old.

I have nothing fantastical to say today.

What I do have are lots of pictures of new treasures for your shopping pleasure, and a reminder that my fundraising for my brother and his girlfriend is ending this Saturday. So if something catches your eye or strikes your fancy, please don't wait! Get it now while it's still available and the money will go to help my favorite brother! (See my previous post for more details.)

What I am about to show you is a mere sampling of what's available. There are tons more options for you to chose from in my 3 shops. Click on the name of the item to see more details and visit the shop in which it resides.

Here are some jewels featuring the hottest colors this season: teal/turquoise and brown.

Pretty Petals Sari Silk Headband

Painted Turquoise Earrings

Painted Turquoise Watch

Day at The Beach Earrings

Teal and Chocolate Flower Romance Ring

Teal and Chocolate Earrings

Teal Flower Power Ring

Teal/Brown Pearls and Petals Necklace

Turquoise Boho Chic Earrings

Turquoise Boho Chic Necklace

My new love is vintage inspired jewelry. To me it just looks so romantic!

White Vintage Lace Necklace

Black and White Earrings

Black Vintage Lace Dangle Necklace

Vintage Lace and Pearl Necklace

Vintage Gray Earrings

Mint Crystal Earrings

Royalty Necklace

Ribbon and Pearls Necklace

Gold Treasure Necklace

Antique Drop Earrings

Fairytale Necklace

(These are my new faves!)

Vintage Blush Earrings

Vintage Blush Necklace

Crimson Jade Necklace

Vintage Style Mint Pearl Necklace

Frayed Roses Necklace

Many of these items are on sale, and most of them have coordinating pieces. There's tons more I don't have pictured, you'll just have to visit my shops! Remember you can shop anytime but the fundraising ends Saturday!!

Bella Regali

Pearls and Petals

It's A 10

Let's Help These 2 Together!

This good looking couple is my brother, Tim and his girlfriend, Megan. (She's lovely, right? And I'm not just saying that because she's wearing Bella Regali jewelry.) I like them. They are good people.

I'm pretty sure that one day Megan will be my sis in law and I couldn't be happier. I love her.

Tim and Megan are leaving the country at the end of the month for an internship in Mozambique.

Tim is a genius when it comes to languages, and he has a desire to take languages that perhaps have not even been written down, and translate the Bible so that they can understand it. Pretty awesome huh? I told you he was cool.

Megan has a love for children and teaching, and she wants to use her gifts to bring people to Christ. I wasn't kidding about these two. Their passion for Jesus and spreading the gospel around the world is inspiring!

Like I said, they are heading to Africa in a matter of weeks to put their gifts to good use, and there is still a good bit of money to be raised. I really want to help them out because I think it's awesome what they are doing. They feel the nudging of the Spirit and they are following His lead happily!

They need to have all their money in by the 17th so here is what I want to do. As you know I have three etsy shops and from now until Saturday, the 15th all profits from every sale will go to help them get to Mozambique to help them share the love of Jesus with those who may not otherwise hear the gospel! The links to all three shops are on the right side of my blog. Please visit them and consider making a purchase. You will get beautiful, unique jewelry, and your money will go to the greatest cause! Many items are under $10, so there's no need to spend a fortune (although if you feel the need to, I won't stop you!). Every little bit will help.

I am doing this as a surprise for them - so don't spill the beans! I am hoping to hand them a hefty check come the end of the week.

(I will try to get some new items in my shops today so you have more to choose from!)

Thanks, and have fun shopping!

Giveaway Winners!!

Alright, kids we have some winners to announce!!

Thanks to all who entered and a super special thank you to all who blogged/vlogged/posted about my shops! You guys are way cool. ;)

Lets just cut to the chase, shall we?

The winner of the flower pin and gift certificate is.......

Joyeful form The Joyeful Journey who said:

Oh my goodness--I love that flower! And it looks GOOD on you! You're so tiny! I would love it!

Congrats girl! Just email me your address and your flower will be on it's way!

The winner of the earrings and gift certificate is......

Kimberly from Kimberly's Korner who said:

I am already a follower. I like the pearl dream earrings.

From your shop I like the Rosette Trio Necklace!

Congrats, Kimberly! Again, just email me your address and your pearl earrings will be on their way to you!

Thanks again to all who participated! Enjoy your prizes, friends!

"Flowers", Fences, and FREE!!

We have been having fantastic weather here lately which means a lot more time spent outside.

Many afternoons have been spent in the park or our backyard. We love it!

Here are a few photos from yesterday.

Bella has discovered dandelions. She gets excited and says "pretty!" and then picks them until her hands are stained yellow.

She was so pumped about her "flowers" she had to show our pup.
See the stained hands?
Then she found out about dirt. That was fun.
A shot with mama.
This is just a photo of our fence - I like it.
And this is the pretty "flower" I found. It was all by itself poor thing.
I hope you all have been able to spend some time outside as well. God sure made us a beautiful world!

Also, don't forget to enter my giveaways!! Remember you all can win a gift certificate - it's a no brainer! Ends tomorrow night! Click here to enter.

Good luck!